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May Highlight from the Author's Desk

In the first place, Jesus wasn't a people pleaser, and I wouldn't want anyone to be one, either. Kind and compassionate? Absolutely. But people pleasing? No.

Under normal circumstances, everyone should be able to stand firm in their beliefs and understand their 'why' without wavering. On the other hand, a people-pleasing mindset may require constant validation and approval from others, even in marriage, leading to instability in decisions and unhealthy relationships.

Stability is crucial for mental well-being and developing trust for lasting relationships.

A people-pleasing mindset would struggle with setting boundaries, leading to unhealthy priorities. As a result, a person can feel resentment toward another—even when it's not justified.

Establishing healthy boundaries is essential for maintaining inner peace and harmony.

A people-pleasing mindset is not fully surrendered to God, though sometimes we present the appearance of a perfect walk with Him. In truth, the closer we draw to God, the more we recognize the areas in our lives that need His transformation. We continually submit to His refining power, allowing Him to shape us into something better than before.

Spiritual growth is a lifelong journey—it never ends.

"Am I now trying to win the favor and approval of men, or of God? Or am I seeking to please someone? If I were still trying to be popular with men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ." Galatians‬ ‭1‬:‭10‬ ‭AMP‬‬

"But just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel [that tells the good news of salvation through faith in Christ], so we speak, not as [if we were trying] to please people [to gain power and popularity], but to please God who examines our hearts [expecting our best]." 1 Thessalonians‬ ‭2‬:‭4‬ ‭AMP‬‬

A people-pleaser is still deeply loved by God. However, God never forces growth on anyone. Our goal should be to honor God and everyone, not people-pleasing.

Transformation is possible for all of us when we recognize our need to submit to God, leading to healthier relationships. It's not our responsibility to change others—that is God's work.

Things to consider before marrying someone who struggles with people-pleasing

05/01/2025 - 2 min read

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